He said it out loud.

(edit) nevermind

if the person i was dating expected/demanded i pay for a date, it would end right there.

.

I think he hit the nail on the head with "but you're supposed to have sex with him whenever he says." That's the old school unspoken contract, if you don't want to do that, you should never expect the other person to pay your way.

*quality

Boosting this quality contribution up in the Hot Listing - declared quality by bareboards2.

That thing about "best friend"? I have been saying that EXACT THING for years.

And not just about who pays for a date. It is for all aspects of the relationship. If I wouldn't put up with certain crap from a friend, why would I from a fella?

Side note -- never have I been in an abusive relationship. I wonder why that is?

But I know I am wired differently.

Long before feminism was a big important concept to me, I went on my first date with a young man I didn't know well.

I was 13 years old, in 1967. We went to a matinee at the local movie theater. Fifty cents a ticket.

I remember standing behind him in line, as he awkwardly paid, and I awkwardly didn't know what to do or say.

And my main thought was -- I have a job. I can afford my own ticket. (I cleaned test tubes in the junior high science lab. I still have sense memories of moldy agar in a petri dish.)

I never got over that. I still feel that way. Go ahead and treat me to something special that you can afford. Next time, it'll be my turn to pick the activity and I'll pick something I can afford.

I was lousy at dating. But I was clear about the basic equality necessary in order to respectful to both of us.

I was always told that the guy should pay for the first date.

I've never been in an abusive relationship; which is odd, since I was raised by an alcoholic and very abusive (to my grandmother) grandfather. Statistically I should be a person that abuses women, but instead I have nothing but the deepest disgust and contempt for someone who abuses their partner.

I married a girl I went to high school with, I was a Junior and she had just graduated. She prefers that I pay and hold doors for her, but then we sort of grew up when that thing was still in fashion.

This hit a lot of points, I'm dating a girl right now who never offers to pay for anything....

This reassures my faith and love towards my GF. We've thoroughly discussed our strengths and weaknesses (and Lord knows I have mine) in open and understanding talks in an effort towards a 50/50 relationship.

I would just like to know how people saw this guy (or a mirror) and said - go ahead and wear that yellow-stained T-shirt during your talk.

this guy is my new hero

I wouldn't know since I never had a date before. Not even a blind type.